its has almost been a month since i blogged.

my days are just plain boring and i've turn over a new leaf.. a dead and dry leaf .. for the past weeks all i did was study meeting study meeting ntg else ok mayb catch one or two movie but seriously its like my social life is dead.

but one good thing is that i got my bursary... so i will be cutting off my working hours so that i can conc on my studies and meetings...studies and meetings again....

damn regretted that i joined lion dragon dance.. -_-'' it took up 2 nights of my every week and its freaking tiring... and that tb director its just fussy and picky with my design on the banner. i changed few times and she still reject my design. she ask for complicated designs and she expect us to draw the banner. wth. fuck her in the pussyhole and shithole and whateva holes she has

do you believe in karma? last year i was having way too much fun and now im paying the price of not getting any of it...

i miss my frens in ipoh and the ppl in aust.....

i miss all the outings and fun and craps that we do...

i miss the sense of belonging...

i wish i can forget what time is and just have fun like mad drink till i collapse and not wake up the next morning..

this is driving me nuts...

is it that as you grow older ur life becomes more stable.. too stable and all responsibility just make u a more dull person and ur life an ultimate boredom? mayb its just me.. because everytime i feel like having fun my right mind will tell me no ur results is simply a piece of bull shit shittier than ever and if u wan ur bursary or whateve next time u should study and not hav fun at all.

another thing i realised y i cant really click with ppl here is most of them they converse and joke in chinese. i cant get their jokes most of the time and this is not fun... ya we hang out we go lec together and stuff but just somehow we wont be that close... its just not the same.. im missing someone's presence... but again there's no use to think and dwell on the past.. everything is just over...

ppl here are all about clubs and meetings.. when i mix with ppl like zy to hav a bit of fun im just killing myself.. its just so tiring to do what is right and against what u wan....

im just not ready for commitment in any sense.....